Nervous Conditions within the Family

Nhamo going off to school created an incredible amount of strain on his family relationships. The tension that arose between himself and his siblings grew to the point in which Tambu refused to communicate with Nhamo and expressed that she was not sorry about her brother’s death. How does such hatred and resentment towards a brother start brewing to such extremes? Those that seem to “out perform” their siblings in grades, careers, marriage and many other aspects of life many times will act proud and above their loved ones. This is not to say that this is always the case, but there is surely something about succeeding past your siblings and being the one that has made the family proud. Not only did Nhamo start to have fallouts with his family, but he became embarrassed with his family lifestyle back at home. Embarrassed of his family’s financial situation, lack of education and language. Tambu caught on to his brother’s shame leading to greater conflict and violence. She yells, “You will still be our father’s son. You will still be my brother. And Netsai’s. Even if you don’t like it. So you had better stop being proud for nothing and be grateful to Babamukuru for helpling you” (49). Growing up, Tambu watched her brother distance himself from his own family. 


During the period of Amish Rumspringa, teenagers of the age of 16 and 18 are free from their parents control and have not yet pledged their submission to the church. During this time it is not supported by parents, but children are free to experience the world outside of their culture. Unlike portrayals of the media, there is an intolerance for children to go out and experience a culture of partying. For many amish communities such as the Swartzentruber Amish you do not go out and flaunt the rules. Parents in this community do not take disobeyal lightly and will send a minister to admonish you for the error of your ways. Tension arises between families especially when children do not want to return home from experiencing a much different culture then their own. Previous relationships can turn into complete silence and disownment.



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